Broken Wings
By Misanoe
With these broken wings of mine
we'll fly away together
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The blast swept me off my feet and I found myself on my knees, Valgarv hovering before me. I felt the sting in my right eye and ignored the sticky red substance pouring down my cheek. Only one thing was entering my head, one thought that kept my tired bruised body from slumping down and admitting defeat. 'We're both alone now.' Amidst all the dead, the evil, a world gone mad the only thing I could think of was him. I sat up and held my hands towards me in a prayer position, mindlessly doing what came first to me whenever I had been faced with an obstacle. But as I sat there not one word would come to me. All I saw were pictures, vivid pictures of time that my mind had captured, to be stuck in my head for an eternity. Flashes of color flied through my head. The elder chief falling, the ancient dragons murdered, graveyards of dead dragons, Lina, Gourry, Amelia shoveling food into their mouths, Zel glowering in a corner, ...Xelloss fighting Valgarv, Xelloss falling, Xelloss smiling, Xelloss attacking the elder chief, but one picture clearer then day stood out from the rest of them. One picture which would be burned in my heart forever. A little boy with green hair crouched on the floor, wailing, his innocent heart unable to comprehend the selfishness that had murdered his race. I thought my heart would break, the emptiness inside eating away at my soul. Every detail immortalized due to my immortal body, everything, down to the black wing on his right shoulder, which lay limp on his side, twisted in an unnatural position.
"Who do you pray to? God or demon?"
I heard his voice invading my mind and suddenly it seemed as though time had stopped. The howling wind, the people around me slowly dimmed and I felt like we had been pulled in an alternate dimension where only he and I existed. Everything else was blocked out and all I could see was him.
I looked up at his face and felt my heart breaking once again as I overlapped the little boy with this grown man. The same. The sorrow, the pain, the sadness in his eyes. The wing, his broken wing. I hesitated searching for something to say to him. Something that would wipe the agony from his eyes forever. I could not find those words and uttered the only ones I could think of.
"I don't know. I can't think of any words to say." I looked down unable to bear the emptiness I felt when I looked at him.
I felt his hand cup my chin and complied as he tilted my face up to meet his eyes. His eyes... tears began to stream down my face as I saw the yearning in his eyes. I tried to escape but his grasp on my face was firm and he refused to budge. The only thing I could do was stare and drown in the pools of his eyes.
The aching in his eyes became unbearable and I lifted my hand towards him gently placing my hand on his cheek, wishing in some insane way that I could share his pain.
I think in someway he understood what I was trying to do. He understood the comfort I was trying to give him for his gaze softened and I was no longer drowning but understanding. I had a sudden clarity that had avoided me my whole life and at that moment I understood him better then I understood myself. We stayed in that position for what seemed like an eternity. His hand beneath my chin and mine on his cheek. We stood still afraid that movement would break this spell. We stayed there clinging to this newfound understanding. Clinging to each other.
"You asked what sacrifices had to be made to make up for what had been done." Valgarv whispered hoarsely, breaking the silence with his plea. "Would you be a sacrifice?"
My eyes widened. Thoughts pouring into my head, swirling around in one big jumble. I would, but I couldn't, I would but I shouldn't.
"Would I be enough?" I asked. If I went with him, would I be enough to stop him, to let humanity stay as it was.
Valgarv knew what I was asking. Knew I wouldn't, couldn't abandon everyone to his will.
He nodded.
I smiled and answered, "Yes."
The comforting blackness that had surrounded us was suddenly gone and replaced with the mad confusion around me. Before I fully realized where I was my body was lifted off the air and I felt strong arms pick me up. Looking up I realized I was in Valgarv's arms. He cradled me tightly to his chest and I felt the air stir beneath us. Everyone stood in shock unsure of what to do with this abrupt turn of events. I twisted my head a little to see everyone one last time. My gaze stopped when it reached Xelloss' face and my eyes lingered for a moment. He stared straight at me and a look of horror and realization dawned in his eyes. Xelloss... for some odd reason had always understood me more then the others. Had always known what was going on in my head and this time was no different. Demon, dragon... we had more similarities then I had wanted to admit. He raised his bow, aimed and fired at us. Valgarv reacted quickly and his wing shielded us both blocking my view of Xelloss. That was the last thing I saw before my tired body succumbed to the darkness.
**********************************
I looked at this girl sleeping in my arms and a sense of peace that had eluded me for over a thousand years grew in me, tingling my body with its sensations. Something akin to relief spread within me and I smiled. This girl, this gold dragon, with her I would find redemption, we would find redemption together.
**********************************
With these broken wings of mine
let's disappear forever
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